Abby celebrating her 3rd Birthday with Grandparents

We were back to Klang on 9/12 to attend a wedding dinner..and the next day, we had lunch with both our parents after church, to pre-celebrate Abby's birthday.. (Hubby won't be around on the actual day, 12.12.12)

Abby was a fortunate girl, to have both Grandparents loving her..

Looked how happy Abby was!

3D2N Singapore trip 10/12-12/12/12

It has been 2 years+ since I last visited Singapore..During that time, Abby was only 3 months old and it was her first oversea trip too..we travelled by car..But this round, we travelled by plane and it would be the first flight experience for both Abby & Ian..Unfortunately, Hubby couldn't join us as he needed to work.

Actually, this trip was initiated by my mum months ago, to visit my sister who is staying in Spore..and we managed to purchase the flight ticket at a promotional price with AirAsia..hence, all 7 of us (my mum, sis, aunties, cousin, me & 2 kids) will be having fun in Singapore!

Day 1 10.12.12
We went to the LCCT airport around 11am by taxi, flight was at 1.35pm..Unfortunately, the flight was delayed by 1hr+ and all of us were tired, especially myself and my aunt, who were so busy entertaining the kids..In the plane, Abby kept asking my aunt many 'why' questions and gotta thank my Aunt for her patience in answering all the questions!

Finally, we reached Spore around 4pm and my sister was already there to pick us up..we headed straight to Ion Orchard for shopping and dinner at Paradise Dynasty Restaurant .. Koh Sang (my cousin brother) & family also joined us for dinner..we celebrated his birthday as well..Dinner was delicious, espcially I got to try out the colorful 小笼包！

After a tiring day, we went back to my sis's hse and rested..Thank God both kids were able to sleep well.

Day 2 11.12.12
Today, we went to World's largest aquarium - Oceanarium, Resorts World Sentosa..ticket price: Adult (13-59yrs old) S$29, Child (4-12yrs old) S$20, Senior citizen (60yrs above) S$20..

It was indeed a large aquarium with more than 800 species of marine animals..we had lunch there as well..

After Oceanarium, we went to the Gardens by the bay..We only visited the Gardens which was free admission..Thereafter, we had dinner at Koh Sang's place before heading back to rest.

Day 3 12.12.12
Today was a special date..not because it was 12.12.12 but it was my gal, Abby's 3rd birthday!

Being a zoo lover, we went to the Singapore Zoo..(I managed to convince my youngest sis & cousin to accompany me) I was a lil disappointed with the Zoo as it was no longer as attractive as 6 yrs ago when I last visited it..

Most of the animals were old and weary..less active..Nonetheless, we had a good time at the zoo..

After spending about 2hrs+ at the zoo, we took the taxi to meet up with my mum & sister for lunch, before departing to the airport..Once again, we had lunch at the Paradise Dynasty Restaurant..My sister, Ai Lee, bought a birthday cake for Abby, with Doraemon picture on it (Barney cake was out of stock)..and as usual, Abby was so excited when she saw the cake..this would be her 3rd bday celebration!

Our flight back to Msia was also delayed..darn! But we had a surprise from the AirAsia crew on board..they sang a birthday song for Abby, wishing her a Happy Birthday! I was joking with my cousin, it would be even better if AA offer me free meals too..hehe..guessed because it was a special date, hence, there was a special treatment!

Overall, our trip was a good one, being able to spend quality time with our family members..the next oversea trip would be on next February, to Perth..it would be a challenging one as I gotta think of ways to keep Ian occupy in order not to make noise throughout the 5 hrs flight!

Abby's 3rd Birthday

2.12.12

About 2 weeks ago, we told Abby that we will be celebrating her birthday in Sunday School (SS)..since then, she was very excited and can't wait for the day to come coz as most of you would know, Abby is a cake person..she loves cake and whenever she sees cake, it means its her birthday!..Almost every night before she slept, she would tell her dad that she will be celebrating her birthday in SS!

When it comes to childrens' party, mothers are always the busiest people at home..gotta organise everything, from ordering cake to preparing goodies for kids..This year, I prepared a simple goodies bag with an red egg, Mamee snack, one jelly, one chocolate bar & one party trumpet..I also baked mini muffins for the kids..

Glad that today's celebration went on smoothly..all the kids were happy and am sure Abby, will treasure these moments when she grows up and read Mummy's blog!

Goodies bag with one handmade birthday cake

Loved the design of this cake, simple and nice..tasted good too! Purchased this cake from MayFlower Pastry Centre

Yummy!

Abby liked her presents..got Barney water bottle, Barney crayons, Barney color pencils, Princess bag, Princess crayon sets, chocolates & candies!

Things to take note on Hokkaido cup cakes

I had baked Hokkaido cup cakes 3 times and wasn't successful, as the cake will sink after cooling down http://aileng116.blogspot.com/2012/10/hokkaido-cup-cake.html ..finally after getting some advices, I learnt the mistake and this round, the cake was much more fluffy and most importantly, it did not sink!

My mistakes:
1. On the egg whites part, I did not fold in the egg whites GENTLY into the egg yolk batter..instead, I used the electric whisk..check out this youtube and you will know what I meant.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Yie5V37E1w

 

2. Do NOT open the door of the oven while baking in process..this will result the cake to sink.

 

 

Cream puff

This is an easy recipe..but takes a bit of practice on the pastry.

Choax pastry:
65g all purpose flolur
1/2 tsp granulated sugar
1/4 tsp salt
57g unsalted butter, cut into pcs
120ml water
2 large eggs, lightly beaten

Whipped cream:
240ml whipped cream
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 tbsp granulated sugar

Glaze:
1 large egg

Garnish:
Powdered sugar

Choux Pastry:

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C) and place rack in center of oven. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or lightly butter or spray the pan with a non stick vegetable spray.

2. In a bowl sift or whisk together the flour, sugar and salt.

3. Place the butter and water in a heavy saucepan over medium high heat and bring to a boil. (Make sure that the butter melts before the water boils to reduce the amount of evaporation.) Remove from heat and, with a wooden spoon, add the flour mixture, all at once, and stir until combined. 

4. Return saucepan to the heat and stir constantly until the dough comes away from the sides of the pan and forms a thick smooth ball (about 1-2 minutes). Transfer the dough to your electric mixer, or use a hand mixer, and beat on low speed to release the steam from the dough (about a minute). Once the dough is lukewarm start adding the lightly beaten eggs (dough will separate and then come together) and continue to mix until you have a smooth thick paste (dough will fall from a spoon in a thick ribbon). 

5. Spoon or pipe 12 small mounds of dough onto the baking sheet, spacing about 2 inches (5 cm) apart. With a pastry brush, gently brush the tops of the dough with a lightly beaten egg.

6. Bake for 15 minutes and then reduce the oven temperature to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Continue to bake for a further 30 to 35 minutes or until the shells are a nice amber color and when split, are almost dry inside. Turn the oven off, poke a couple of holes in each puff and, with the oven door slightly ajar, let the shells completely cool (and dry out).

Whipped Cream:

1. In a large mixing bowl place the whipping cream, vanilla extract, and sugar and stir to combine. Cover and chill the bowl and whisk in the refrigerator for at least 15 minutes. When chilled, whip the cream just until stiff peaks form.

To Assemble:

1. Split the pastry shells in half and fill (or pipe) with whipped cream. Place the top half of the pastry shell on the whipped cream and dust with powdered (confectioners or icing) sugar. Leftover Cream Puffs can be stored in the refrigerator.

Makes 12 cream puffs.

Read more: http://joyofbaking.com/CreamPuffs.html

Chocolate Cheese Cake

Last Sat, I baked Chocolate cheese cake for my hubby's 33th birthday..this was also my 4th attempt baking cheese cake..previous 3 attempts were not suceessful, the cheese content was either too hard or too soft..hence, this round, I paid extra attention to the gelatin powder quantity..a crucial part of the cheese content..and BINGO..hubby commented it was really good..phew!


Recipe:-
The base
175g McVities Digestive Biscuits
80g Unsalted butter
50g Castor sugar

1. Crush all the biscuits till it become almost like sand texture (crumbs) and mix it with the castor sugar.
2. Melt the butter. Pour the butter into a tray together with biscuits crumbs. Mix it well.
3. Compress it evenly on the base of the tray. Put in the fridge for at least 1hour or till it is hardened.
4. Make some small holes all over the base using a fork (this is to ensure the cheese sticks to the base).

The Cheese content
500g cream cheese
1 cup of fresh yoghurt
340g bittersweet chocolate, chopped
280g (or 2/3 of a small tin) of sweetened condensed milk
8 teaspoon of gelatin powder, with 200ml water

1. Melt the chopped chocolate in a stainless steel bowl placed over a saucepan of simmering water, stirring until smooth. Remove from heat and set aside to cool.
2. Let the cheese cool down to room temperature.
3. Pour the water into a small pot and heat up under low heat. Then, pour the gelatin powder into the pot and stir it thoroughly until melted. The end product is a very thick and sticky gelatin mixture. Set aside for use. 
***if you are using only 50% of the ingredients, then put 4 tsp of gelatin powder wtih 100ml water***
4. Using an electric hand mixer, blend the cheese well to make it soft.5. Next pour in the sweetened condensed milk and mix it well. Then pour the yoghurt in as well. Blend it well and thoroughly.
6. Quickly pour this gelatin mixture into the earlier cheese content and then mix it well.
7. Then put in the melted chocolate. This time do not use the electric mixer, just use a spoon to evenly stir the melted chocolate with the cheese content.
8. Finally, pour the final cheese content into the earlier prepared base tray. Decorate as desired.
9. The cheese cake should remain in the fridge for at least 2 hours (or overnight) before consuming. Enjoy!

Candy cane cookies

I saw this interesting recipe online, my favourite baking website, www.joyofbaking.com and decided to give it a try..Not successful for the first time as I didn't pay attention to the baking time..ended up over baked..so, today I baked again and thank God, cookies turned out nice..and as usual, I only follow 50% of the ingredients..

1st attempt, failed...over baked and too 'fat'

2nd attempt, successful!

My No.1 supporter!

Ingredients:

2 1/2 cups (325 grams) all purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 cup (227 grams) unsalted butter, room temperature

1 cup (120 grams) confectioners sugar (powdered or icing)

2 large egg yolks

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon pure almond extract (I skipped this)

1/2 teaspoon red liquid food coloring (can use red paste food coloring)

Method:

1. In a bowl, whisk the flour with the salt.

2. In the bowl of your electric mixer (or with a hand mixer), beat the butter and sugar until creamy. Add the egg yolks and vanilla and almond extracts and beat until combined. Scrape down the sides of the bowl as needed.

3. Add the flour mixture, in three additions, and beat until you have a smooth dough.

4. Remove half of the dough from the mixing bowl. To the remaining half add the red food coloring and beat on low speed until well blended. If you find the dough too soft, cover and refrigerate for 30-60 minutes.  

5. Take a walnut sized piece of red dough and a walnut sized piece of white dough. Separately, roll each color on a lightly floured surface, into a 4-5 inch (10-12.5 cm) long rope. Place the two ropes side by side, gently press together, and twist the two ropes to form a spiral.

6. Place the cookies on a parchment lined baking sheet, spacing the cookies about 2 inches (5 cm) apart. Shape each cookie into a cane shape by bending one end into a hook shape. (If you find the cookies a little soft, place the baking sheet (with the unbaked cookies) in the refrigerator for about 15 minutes before baking.)

7. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C) and place rack in center of oven. Bake cookies for about 8 - 10 minutes or until set and the edges of the cookies are just starting to brown. Do not over bake.

8. Remove from oven and let cookies cool completely on baking sheet. Cover and store in an airtight container for about a week. These cookies can be frozen.

Makes about 30 cookies


Read more: http://joyofbaking.com/CandyCaneCookie.html

人最大的不幸 就是不知道自己幸福

有一个富翁，非常的有钱。凡是可以用钱买得到的东西，他都买来拥有享受。

然而，他却觉得自己一点也不快乐不幸福。他很困惑...

一天，他突发奇想，将家中所有贵重物品、首饰、黄金、珠宝通通装入一个大袋子中。

开始去旅行。他决定只要谁可以告诉他幸福的方法。他就把整个袋子送给他。

他找了又找，问了又问。直到一个小村庄。有位村民告诉他。

你应该去见这位大师。如果他也没办法。

就算你跑到天涯海角，也没有人可以帮你了！

终于见到了正在打坐的大师。富翁非常激动的说：

我只有一个目的，我一生的财产都在这袋子里。

只要你能告诉我幸福的方法，袋子就是你的了。

这时天色已黑，夜已降临。

大师顿时抓了富翁手上的袋子，就往外跑了。

富翁一急，又哭又叫的追着跑。毕竟是外地人。

不一会，就跟丢了。只见富翁一边哭道。我被骗了。呜。我一生的心血。

最后大师跑了回来，将袋子还给了他。富翁见到失而复得的袋子。

立刻将其抱在怀里。直说：太好了。！

只见大师再度出现在他的面前问：你现在觉得如何？幸福吗？

幸福。我觉得自己真的太幸福了！

大师笑说：这并不是什么特别的方法。

只是人对于自己所拥有的一切。都视之为理所当然。

所以不觉得幸福。你欠缺的是一个失去的机会。

这样你马上就会知道。你所拥有的有多重要。

其实你现在怀里所抱的袋子与之前的是同一个，现在你还愿意把它送我吗？

有趣的一篇故事。不知道它可以带给你多少的想法。

不知道。你有没有发现。当你失去或缺乏某些东西时。

你会念念不忘。然而一但拥有了。却又容易忽视它。甚至视而不见。

如果你恋爱过。你就会明白怎么回事。恋爱之初……

对方的一通电话一句问候一份礼物。都会使你高兴个许久。

只是。一旦关系确立。或结婚。这一切将会消失或者变成理所当然。

『理所当然』你有可能会珍惜吗？

就如常说的。人总是一直在意已失去的。却不懂得珍惜还拥有的。

人生最大的不幸。就是生在福中不知福。

最近在看一本书。幸与不幸都是福。最后用书中的一段话来作个结束：

人最大的不幸。就是不知道自己是幸福的。

我们很少想到自己还拥有什么。对于失去的。欠缺的却一直念念不忘。

所以说。上天为了要使我们有看见的能力。就安排了各种失去的课程。

藉由失去。让人学习『看见』的能力。

---看见自己拥有的幸福---

One day trip to Penang Hill

14.11.12, Wednesday

It was a sunny and hot day..and we planned to go Penang Hill!

My mum came to visit me in Kulim on last Friday and today she was going back to Klang with my sister, Ai Hoi, who came to Penang with her friend 2 days ago.

We went to pick up my sister from Georgetown Hotel before heading to Penang Hill..We reached there about 10.45am and it was already "people mountain people sea" ..CROWDED! Hubby also had problem searching for parking..

Price for the train as follows:

Adults: RM8 (with MyKad), RM30 (without MyKad)

Child (3 yrs-12 yrs): RM4 (with MyKad), Rm15 (without MyKad)

Senior citizen (55 yrs and above): RM4

Please click here for more details.

There were 5-6 stalls operating near the ticket counter, mainly selling hats, sunglasses, t-shirts, snacks and drinks..One of the woman managed to convince me to buy 2 hats @RM9 each for my babies..good job!

And the ride began...luckily the queue was quite fast and both children were behaving well..I think the ride took about 15min to reach the top..We spent about 30min on the hill, taking photos before heading back to Georgetown..

After sending off my mum and sis, we went to check out the new mall, Gurney Paragon..However, was a bit disappointed coz the mall was still under construction..(weird, when I checked the website, it shown that the mall was completed with many tenants..maybe I didn't read properly)..anyway, we spent about 40mins, checking out the restaurants there..will definitely come back again when the mall is ready!



what a lovely scene..Abby & Ian spenting quality time together.



Time spent with family is priceless!

Handmade 3D Christmas tree

Yesterday, I taught the Sunday School children how to make your own Christmas tree..I learnt this from my art teacher long long time ago, and I still keep a copy of it till now (after 10+ years)

 

This is a quite fun craftwork and you can get the materials easily.

 

Method:

1. Cut out 3(three) tree shapes from the green cardboard.

2. Paste the tree shapes together using UHU glu, to make it a 3D tree.

3. Decorate the tree with beautiful decorative items.

4. Punch 2(two) holes, each on top and bottom of the tree, in order to insert the 'hanger' and bell.

 

 





Abby decorating her Christmas tree carefully.

Almost done..



Yeah..my beautiful Christmas tree!

 

感人的离婚解释

一对夫妻办理了离婚手续后，不知该如何向年幼的孩子解释所发生的一切。两个人在孩子的床前坐了良久。后来女的说：“你走吧，过几天，由我来向孩子解释。”

在接下来的几天里，这位女人就像往常一样，无微不至地照顾着孩子，给孩子精心准备一日三餐，检查孩子的作业，认真签署家长意见等等。从孩子脱离母乳以来，一直都是做母亲的几乎承揽了这些本该是夫妻共同来做的一切。那位做父亲的，据孩子的奶奶讲：“心早就不在了”。
...

过了十来天的一个晚上，做母亲的合上故事书，给孩子掖了掖被角，说：“你还记得妈妈讲过天使的故事吧。天使在天上飞，如果看到有人受冷，受饿了，她就会下来帮助他，给他当差。等到被帮助的人一切都好了，不当差的天使就会飞走，继续去寻找需要她帮助的人。世界上的爸爸妈妈都是天使，是专门飞来照顾孩子的，陪孩子一起好好长大的。在咱们家里，有妈妈一个人，就能照顾好宝贝了，所以，爸爸才放心地把宝贝交给妈妈。爸爸就像给你当完差的天使一样，去了澳大利亚，帮助另外的孩子去了，那是一个很远的地方……”

这是我有生以来听说过的，父母在孩子面前对“离婚”作出的最美，也是最阳光灿烂的解释，我被这位母亲博大的情怀深深地感动了。

按说，夫妻离婚是人一生当中最重大的挫折之一。离婚双方的心灵所遭受的重创，是恩爱夫妻难以想像的。当你深爱着的、相濡以沫的、一直以为要相伴着走到人生尽头的人，突然提出要离你而去，世界就像在瞬间失去了色彩；又譬如漫步在一片绿草茵茵且开满鲜花的无垠大草原上，突然失足掉入一个极深的寒冷洞穴里…

这时候，有相当多的人会表现出极度的愤怒，会产生恨意，继而不顾一切，当着孩子的面大吵大闹，恶语相向，甚至把孩子推来搡去或争来抢去，给孩子的心灵造成一生都抹不去的阴影！

这位母亲，她也痛，她也苦。但她想到了孩子，她便理智待之，坦然处之，对孩子作出了如此的解释。弃他而去的丈夫，在她对孩子的描述中，居然是天使...

Hokkaido Cup Cake

Last 2 weeks when we were back home in Klang, we bought 2 boxes of Hokkaido cup cakes from RT Pastry - Vanilla & Chocolate flavour..this was my second time eating it..Hubby liked it so much, especially the filling, the texture was smooth and delicious..

Since I am a baking person, so I decided to give it a try..1st attempt and turned out quite good, with lots of rooms for improvements..for eg:

1. The cake sinked after cooling down..don't know what's the reason, gotta find out and work on it..(read this for more info and updated baking results)

2. Didn't blend the sugar well, could taste the sugar in both the cake and filling..next round, gotta use the caster sugar instead of blending the normal sugar for baking.

3. Texture of the cake not fluffy enough..again, gotta work on it.

Chiffon cake
3 egg yolks

20g castor sugar
35g corn oil
60g full cream milk
70g cake flour
3 egg whites
25g castor sugar

Filling
100g or about 150ml dairy whipping cream
10g castor sugar
1 tbsp instant custard powder
Icing sugar, for dusting

Method
1. Pre-heat oven to 170C.
2. Arrange paper liners on baking tray.
3. Hand whisk egg yolk and sugar till pale in colour.
4. Add in corn oil and milk, mix well.
5. Sift in cake flour, stir to combine.
6. Beat egg white until foamy, gradually add sugar, and continue beat till soft peak form.
7. Take 1/3 of egg white and use a hand whisk to mix into egg yolk batter.
8. Fold in the balance egg white with a spatula till well combine.
9. Scoop batter into pre-arranged paper liners to about ¾ full.
10. Bake for 20-25 mins at middle rack.
11. Beat whipping cream with sugar till firm and stiff.

12. Add in custard powder, mix well.
13. Pipe custard cream into cupcake and dust with icing sugar. Refrigerated before consume.



the cake sinked after cooling..gotta improve on this!

別告訴我會找到更好的、在我心目中、只有你最好

人、永遠沒辦法體會
女人從懷孕到生產…
這9個月裡所受的煎熬

生產完了…
...

大多數人都在關心
寶寶長的像誰
寶寶健不健康
寶寶甚麼甚麼的

只有少部分人正真的
去關心過剛生產完的媽媽

生產出來後寶寶如果出現什麼問題
全世界只會責怪媽媽在懷孕的時候
沒有做到什麼、或做錯什麼…

有多少人會想到 寶寶有問題…
最心疼的人是懷胎9個月的媽媽

一個連打針抽血都怕的人
願意為了你 …
在懷孕時期打針抽血
願意忍受超出人體承受能力
10級的痛楚 …
把你和她的寶寶生下來

所以請好好的珍惜
你的老婆、媽媽
請感謝她們為你的付出
她們的付出是不求回報的 ♥

Think you are ready to have children?

Most broody mothers see having a child as a wonderful gift from God but one anonymous blogger has set about putting paid to that ideal.

 

A candid new parent test highlighting the high and lows of motherhood is taking the internet by storm after being reposted on countless mothering blogs.

The test - 14 steps to follow before you have children - was recently posted on Mamami by Chet, who was sent the parenting test by a friend.

Chet said: 'Most people will tell you that "it" is the hardest, most rewarding, rollercoaster job you will ever have - there's no pay, you are on duty 24/7 and, at times, it seems like there are few rewards.

'Being a parent has its ups and downs. I wouldn't change my title as "mummy" for anything in the world, however when this came through my inbox from a great friend it made me laugh (a lot!)'

If you think you are ready to embrace the joys of motherhood, we have printed the 14 tests here to see if you are really up to the challenge...

Test 1: Preparation

Women: To prepare for pregnancy

1. Put on a dressing gown and stick a beanbag down the front.

2. Leave it there.

3. After 9 months remove 5% of the beans.

Men: To prepare for children

1. Go to a local chemist, tip the contents of your wallet onto the counter and tell the pharmacist to help himself

2. Go to the supermarket. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home. Pick up the newspaper and read it for the last time.

 

Test 2: Knowledge

Find a couple who are already parents and berate them about their methods of discipline, lack of patience, appallingly low tolerance levels and how they have allowed their children to run wild.

Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's sleeping habits, toilet training, table manners and overall behaviour.

Enjoy it. It will be the last time in your life that you will have all the answers.

 

Test 3: Nights

To discover how the nights will feel:

You can kiss goodbye to precious beauty sleep as soon as you have a child

1. Walk around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 4 - 6kg, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.

2. At 10pm, put the bag down, set the alarm for midnight and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 11pm and walk the bag around the living room until 1am.

4. Set the alarm for 3am.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and make a cup of tea.

6. Go to bed at 2.45am.

7. Get up again at 3am when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs in the dark until 4am.

9. Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up when it goes off.

10. Make breakfast.

Keep this up for 5 years. LOOK CHEERFUL.

Test 4: Dressing Small Children

1. Buy a live octopus and a string bag.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the string bag so that no arms hangout.

Time Allowed: 5 minutes.

 

Test 5: Cars

1. Forget the BMW. Buy a practical 5-door wagon.

2. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.

3. Get a coin. Insert it into the CD player.

4. Take a box of chocolate biscuits; mash them into the back seat.

5. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

 

Test 6: Going for a walk

The hilarious blog post details a new parent test for broody mothers

a. Wait.

b. Go out the front door.

c. Come back in again.

d. Go out.

e. Come back in again.

f. Go out again.

g. Walk down the front path.

h. Walk back up it.

i. Walk down it again.

j. Walk very slowly down the road for five minutes.

k. Stop, inspect minutely and ask at least 6 questions about every piece of used chewing gum, dirty tissue and dead insect along the way.

l. Retrace your steps.

m. Scream that you have had as much as you can stand until the neighbours come out and stare at you.

n. Give up and go back into the house.

You are now just about ready to try taking a small child for a walk.

Test 7: Conversations with children

Repeat everything you say at least 5 times.

Test 8: Grocery Shopping

1. Go to the local supermarket. Take with you the nearest thing you can find to a pre-school child - a fully grown goat is excellent. If you intend to have more than one child, take more than one goat.

2. Buy your weekly groceries without letting the goat(s) out of your sight.

3. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.

Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

 

Test 9: Feeding a 1 year-old

1. Hollow out a melon

2. Make a small hole in the side

3. Suspend the melon from the ceiling and swing it side to side

4. Now get a bowl of soggy cornflakes and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon while pretending to be an aeroplane.

5. Continue until half the cornflakes are gone.

6. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot of it falls on the floor.

Test 10:TV

1. Learn the names of every character from the Wiggles, Barney, Teletubbies and Disney.

2. Watch nothing else on television for at least 5 years.

Test 11: Mess

Can you stand the mess children make? To find out:

Are you up to the challenge of parenthood asks this hilarious blog post

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains

2. Hide a fish behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flowerbeds and then rub them on clean walls. Cover the stains with crayon. How does that look?

4. Empty every drawer/cupboard/storage box in your house onto the floor and proceed with step 5.

5. Drag randomly items from one room to another room and leave them there.

Test 12: Long Trips with Toddlers

1. Make a recording of someone shouting 'Mummy' repeatedly. Important Notes: No more than a 4 second delay between each Mummy. Include occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet.

2. Play this tape in your car, everywhere you go for the next 4 years.

You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

 

Test 13:Conversations

1. Start talking to an adult of your choice.

2. Have someone else continually tug on your shirt hem or shirt sleeve while playing the Mummy tape listed above.

You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

Test 14: Getting ready for work

1. Pick a day on which you have an important meeting.

2. Put on your finest work attire.

3. Take a cup of cream and put 1 cup of lemon juice in it

4. Stir

5. Dump half of it on your nice silk shirt

6. Saturate a towel with the other half of the mixture

7. Attempt to clean your shirt with the same saturated towel

8. Do not change (you have no time).

9. Go directly to work

You are now ready to have children. ENJOY!!